ON SAYING "NO"

It is said that as we mature with age there could be times when unlearning the learnt followed by relearning the unlearnt, though arduous at times, may be desirable. And one of them could well be as to how to say 'NO.'...

We are well aware of the panache with which a toddler or a kid says NO. Thus as a corollary, we grown-ups should have been a past-master at it, but several of us perhaps are not...

In fact many of us gradually develop a complex that saying NO amounts to avoiding responsibilities at home, shirking duties at the workplace, self-centeredness amongst friends and so on and so forth. In short, saying NO is invariably a tough proposition for the sayer, and an unpleasant response for the listener...

The nonchalance of the kid slowly gives way to a manner of saying NO. One develops one's own approach, ranging from perhaps a deafening silence to showing an initial (artificial) interest, to putting one's conditions, to checking one's priority list and the pros and cons, to finally uttering a real hard NO...

The pain of saying NO is by and large thrust upon us, and out of the blue on occasions. It stands out as a stress that one has to learn to live with. The stress of making a choice. The stress of a possible guilt feeling. The stress of a potential harsh discord. The stress of losing out somewhere, on someone. All these odds getting stacked against is a real heartache...

A 'NO' is generally considered a withdrawal from one's "goodwill balance" account. Nevertheless saying NO may often be necessary, but the essence is in doing it well, taking care it doesn't turn out to be like a slap on the face for the asker...

But it is OK to say NO...  🙂🙂

🙏🙏